Sometimes choosing your flower girls and ring-bearer can be very hard... especially when you have families & friends who think that their kids should be in your wedding... no questions asked... I mean, as if! You should already know this because we go waaaaaay back or we have the same blood running through our veins. NOT!!!!!!!!
Just in case no one bothered to mention this very minuscule but highly important & relevant point... IT'S YOU & YOUR FIANCE'S WEDDING & YOU STILL GET TO DECIDE... not your mama, papa, siblings, bff or in-laws... YOU!!!
Clarity achieved... now let's move on to some pointers:
1. Choose kids that are AGE APPROPRIATE... 5 years and up and in some cases a 4 year old will work (there's a method to my madness... just keep reading).
2. They need to be able to understand and follow directions.
3. They should be assertive, outgoing, friendly & able to smile when prompted.
4. Our more hyper cuties may not be eligible for this event as well... you need a child that will be able to stand or sit without interrupting the ceremony (granted we try to keep the ceremony within reasonable time... I mean geez, even us adults tend to get a bit antsy with those long drawn out stuff too... (something to consider when planning the ceremony program).
5. They should be able to be away from mom and or dad for a few hours without freaking, crying or throwing tantrums (how embarrassing!!!)
That's about it... plain, simple & to the point.
Kids are cute & fun to have around, but being a ring-bearer and a flower girl is a huge responsibility... and most times those responsibilities are a bit out of their element & not a part of their daily routine.
So brides, no need to be coy (bashful, shy, evasive) when making your selection. If need be, feel free to politely point out the obvious reasons why a particular child was not selected if the parents ask... and trust, some of them will have the nerve to... oh, an even better one... some of them will be mad at you (LOL). But that's ok, again, it's YOUR wedding!
And let me just throw this out there for those parents that will catch feelings because their child was not selected to participate in a wedding... "SHAME ON YOU!" "this too shall pass and you will get over it." ☺
In the words of Corporate America... "Only the qualified need apply."
Until next time,
Smile, you're on camera.
Keesha, let's not only talk about the ring bearers. Some people already think that they are already and automatically on the guest list when you announce your engagement. When Vic and I announced we were getting married, some were like, "A weh mi a go wear a di wedding now?" I was like, "Aaaahhhhmmmm....it's gonna be a SMALL wedding." And they weren't even family members - not even close friends! I had a cousin who was making plans to come to the wedding without and invitation. I had to lay it straight. She said my mother invited her and my aunt to the wedding. Really? I thought it was MY wedding? I have not gotten any congratulations from her or gotten any comments from her on my album on facebook. Oh well!
ReplyDeletePeople have to understand, family or not, that if we did not approach them about our wedding in any way, it's not that we don't love them, it's just that our plans are for a reason. It's not about them. Isn't the most important thing our happiness? Good grief!
Jovel
@ Jovel, not to worry mama I'm writing one about that too (lol).
ReplyDeleteThanx 4 stoppin by ;-)
Muah!
ReplyDeleteGirl you ain't never lie! I had to keep it to a minimum just to avoid the drama-lol. Love the blog. You should shop it around to some of the wedding magazines . . .and how about some tips on finding a good makeup artist . . . and a good photographer . . .oh so many things you and Tony could do together . . .very happy for you two!
ReplyDeletePS
Still haven't heard from the Richmond makeup artist yet . . .but then again, I did miss two calls today . ..i'll check it out and see if maybe I just missed them.
Hugs!
MiQuel, u are too funny!
ReplyDeletethanks for the love.
keep us in your prayers... i think by now you should have received that call ☺
muah!
@ Jovel, smooches back at ya ma' ☺